Thursday, March 19, 2009

"Corporate" Wisdom??


After the glorious college days, I had a glamorous beginning to my career when I entered into the world of corporates!!!! First I was awestruck by their knowledge, their contacts, their meticulous planning....then there was this extreme emotion of shock when I learnt about the 'preach to never practise' and many such one-way applicable attitudes....After approximately 5.5years into this structurally unstructured world I can say, I am on my path to wisdom!!


The unknown "they" say, there are equations to life - true, very true - following are my take on equations to 'corporate' life:


  • You bill your client in DOG hours and pay your staff in MAN hours - sure enough indicates, you are expected to work like a dog.

  • Pay 3 persons salary to 1 person and make him feel blessed & important and then he HAS AN OPTION to take up 1/2 dozen persons load or 1/2 dozen +Team Lead's load or 1/2 dozen +Team Lead's load+ Manager's load - OFCOURSE, THE RIGHT to opt, lies very high up!

  • You know how to click all the buttons in word & excel - knowledge of when to click what is an insult to the entire corporate world.

  • You make optimum utilisation of English as a written & spoken language - your work is always "perfect", "great", "awesome", most likely than all, its "fair enough" - although in absolute reality the concept of fairness is extinct!!

  • You insist that your staff work all days of the week including saturday and give them the "flexibility" of working from home on a Sunday - in case you are not insisting (yet), trust me, you are a total disgrace to the whole corporate boss world!!!

  • You diligently conduct a GLOBAL survey every year and 'discuss' the concerns on work-life balance consistently year after year - I doubt if the survey results really need to be analysed (assuming they are) - where's the logic?? You are a DOG, you ONLY work....'work-life balance' is just another phrase!!!

I read a small story the other day, allow me to narrate it and your options are limited to reading on:

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A rabbit asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”
The crow answered: “Sure, why not.”
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.


Moral of the story: To surive sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up!!!!!

2 comments:

  1. Love the story part. Awesome sarcastic piece of work. One more thing to add though, sit at top do nothing BUT screw people's life below you and sometimes dig your own grave too :)

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